The rinds of life

Yesterday evening was not so great. 

After my bath yesterday I sat for some time relaxing in the armchair of my bay window watching the sun go down, completely blissed out. 

The only thing interrupting the sound of the waves was an occasional rumble from my stomach. I hadn’t eaten anything since midday – and was beginning to feel hungry. 

The hotel served chips. Lots of chips. With chips. Or you could have a side order of chips. Fried. DEEP Fried. 

In the room I had tea and coffee and biscuits

I haven’t had a biscuit for AGES but I’m aware that they are lethal, even in small numbers. Apparently they hunt in packs and often catch victims when they’re alone. 

This serving had 3 digestives. I decided to check the slimming world app. The news was not good. If I decided to make my evening meal these three wafers of evil it would cost me up to 12 syns. 

I decided therefore to head out for another walk into town to the Tesco Metro. I’d get some apples, some cherry tomatoes and some chicken pieces and eat them by the sea. 

It was the right thing to do and initially as I walked along the promenade I was incredibly glad I’d ventured out. 

Since I was last here a huge storm had destroyed a lot of the seafront and it had been regenerated in style. A folk music recital was playing in the new communal ‘bandstand’ by the beach and I stopped to take a look. 

The music wasn’t my cup of tea – but there was a nice aura of calm there, and lots of beards and sandals. 

The whole spectacle just made me feel at home. 

I carried on to the shop after a while – stopping to look at the changes to the town I once knew on the way. A big old pub was now a huge coffee shop. That’s progress!

‘He’s a big guy! Look at the SIZE of HIM!’ 

I turned to see the source of a voice. A group of drunks. Wonderful. I carried on walking. 

‘Wow he’s massive!’ I heard one of them slur. 

I walked over the road and into Tescos. They remained sat nearby. 

I picked up my food. I was shaken (plus a little threatened if I’m honest) and I forgot to take a basket on the way in. I picked up my items and moved to the queue, balancing them shakily in my arms. 

Why now. Why of ALL TIMES when I’m THIS happy? 

I paid for my groceries and moved on. I would have to walk past them again on the way back. I refused to take the long way to avoid them. 

‘Blooooody hell!’ I heard one of them say as I passed. 

I ignored it and carried on walking to the sea front to find a bench. The sunset was still visible and I didn’t plan to waste a second of it. 

As I sat there feeling completely crestfallen. Then, as I lamented about how crap it all was on my SW Facebook group I was approached by a curious seagull. 

This guy was only interested in my apple. He didn’t care about my waistline – and watched me intently, flipping his head from side to side to make sure he had the best view. 

I threw him a piece. He ran forward and gobbled it up. Seagulls like Braeburn apples it seems. 

I threw him another piece. This time closer to me. He viewed me suspiciously. Was this a trap? I remained motionless eating my apple. He started walking around me in a 10ft exclusion zone, trying to decide whether I could be trusted. 

I didn’t move. 

He flew off and sat on the fence. He would play it cool. He didn’t need apple. Pffft. He was better than that. He had rules. 10ft. No closer. 

I didn’t move. 

Ok. Apple is nice. He clearly didn’t get a lot of apples. He moved to the bench – a bit closer and flapped his pearly white and grey wings, again looking at me side on. 

I didn’t move. 

Slowly. Eeeeever so slowly he edged forward, hopping off the bench. He was now within the magical 10ft boundary and moving closer in a circling motion. Maybe the apple was worth it after all – and it seemed the big guy didn’t have bad intentions. 

I didn’t move. 

Then – without further ado the apple was gone, and he skittered back to relative safety, breathing a sigh of relief and ruffling his feathers. 

I shared the rest of my apple with him at varying distances – watching his delicate ballet with fascination as he tactically retrieved the food and each time retreated to watch me again. 

I wondered if he had seagullings at home to feed. Maybe I was keeping them fed too. 

That gull seemed the best company a man could have at that moment in time. We both watched eachother and the last dying embers of sunlight dissapear as he sat on the rail in front of me before finally flying off when darkness completely descended on the horizon. 

Although I love people sometimes I dearly wish there were none, and that I could just – for once – be left alone, without abuse or attack. 

Animals never judge and I really love them for it… but I can’t hide away from the world with just them for company. 

Thankfully this is not the every day norm of my life but honestly sometimes it’s the every OTHER day norm, and I hate it. 

However. I have friends who make it better. People who I care about – and that’s what I have to focus on. 

These idiots won’t stop me. They don’t stand a chance. They might win for an hour or two – but ultimately they mean less than bacon rind to me, which at breakfast I cut off. Thinking of them, and their small minded drunkeness. 

I had no need of their rind. It does me no good. I cut off all the fat, avoided all of the sausages and bread, filled my plate with the correct SW speed ratio and treated the memory of them and my chunks of gristle with the contempt they deserve. 

Later Internet I’ll meet my dad and see what the rest of the day holds. With my head up. Getting on with life while those idiots deal with their hangover. 


26 thoughts on “The rinds of life

  1. Complete knob head’s Dave you are worth a million more than they will ever be, I hope they’ve all got crippling headaches this morning tossers, excuse my language morons like that make me sick. You are an amazing guy and are doing brilliantπŸ’•πŸ’•πŸ’•πŸ‘πŸ‘

    Liked by 2 people

  2. This morning they will have hangovers and this evening they may well do it all again because they know no better; but you’ll still be awesome and worth more than they ever will. Pity them for they will never know the things you know, feel the things you feel and aspire to the things you aspire to. It’s hard to take but their behaviour is so irrational and arbitrary as to be meaningless in the grand scheme of things. Forza Dave πŸ™‚

    Liked by 2 people

  3. I completely agree with Lin, Jo and Bob!!! It makes me so angry how ignorant and callous humans can be. 😦 I am glad that you did not let it weaken your resolve to continue to make good choices for yourself. You’ve come so far, and no one can take that away from you!
    You were also gracious enough not to tell them what to do with their comments πŸ™‚ . I’m not sure I would have been as forgiving at that precise moment.
    The scenery is beautiful, and I’m glad the seagull happened along at the perfect moment to distract you and remind you of the serene joys in life.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Feck those goat lickers Dave. However also watch out for seagulls they are feckers. I had only which keep trying to nonchalantly get close to our rubbish bag whilst camping. It ripped it up scatting rubbish all over the shop. It also got in the tent at one point on the weekend.

    Liked by 1 person

      • Bastards is what I call them! Small minded bastards. Its very upsetting though to hear domeone personally attacking your appearance. Ive had it done to me too. They are low life scum and sadky they do exsist. They know nothing about you and who gives a shit what they think or say. Dont waste another thought on them or their opinions as they are worthless. You are doing a great job and you can hold your head up high in the knowledge that you are a far better person than them. Bastards! Keep it up yuor doing great xxx

        Liked by 1 person

  5. Fuck shit bastard wank, tossers. Not sure what this is about but thought I’d join in. We have some prime candidates for the scripting of Father Jack Hacketts dialogue in any forthcoming serious of Father Ted!!

    On a serious note, agree with everyone above. God knows what’s going on in those people’s lives that makes them so hateful, but clearly being thin isn’t the path to happiness. Being healthy is, as you’re a clear example of. Forget them Tourettes inducing feckers!! You have much more to offer society.

    Liked by 1 person

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