Fragrant butts

My usual Friday night insomnia has been more rampant than usual today/tonight/this morning or whatever it is now.

I suppose that it’s Saturday (regardless of what my brain thinks) as I’m currently sitting outside Sainsburys waiting for it to open at 6.25am. I’ve been up all night faffing about – simultaneously too tired to do anything productive, but far too awake to go back to sleep.

The reason I’m here is that I decided at 5am to take back all of the coffee I ordered by mistake the other day (8x200g packs of beans rather than ground coffee!) and to use this daft task as an early excuse to go for a 4 mile walk before I hit the scales.

With this chronic lack of sleep you might expect me to be grumpy – but I’m actually in a darn good mood despite being tired.

Why? You may ask. The answer is some clothes shopping that I engaged in yesterday.

As regular readers will know my absolute favourite things lately are charity shops. They represent the removal of some serious financial chains that I’ve carried around for a long time.

Back in late December 2016 I needed some smart clothes relatively quickly and at the time the ONLY choice I had was the outsized clothes shop in Leamington.

Shirts were all £40 or above. Trousers were all £40 or above. Belts £20 or £30 depending on the buckle. I looked for my shoes and a tie elsewhere.

In the end to look smart for an interview (which irritatingly only materialised in February when the trousers had begun to get quite loose) I spent over £200 – which (after being made redundant six months previously) was waaaay outside my comfort zone.

I was also really unhappy with how they made me feel at the time (although I didn’t make a big deal of it) and didn’t properly try the bits of my outfit on all together until January 2017 – when I decided to take some photos.

These snaps never saw the light of day because I was so unimpressed with how I felt I appeared when I tucked my shirt in.

My face says it all.

Now I’m in need of smart clothes again, but THIS TIME I’m no longer held hostage by one shop and totally dependant upon what they have in stock.

After hunting around for a couple of hours yesterday and annoying many many women by monopolising the changing rooms over and over again I found some serious bargains – and although I’m still hunting for a darker pair of trousers I’m pretty happy with what I managed to find.

I’m also pretty chuffed with the visual difference between January and now (apologies for the blurry photo)!

The clothes I’m wearing seem to be pretty much brand new from what I can tell – and I feel really smart for the first time since 1999 (no joke).

  • Trousers (Jacamo) £3.50
  • Jacket (M&S) £6.99
  • Shirt (M&S) £2.75
  • Tie (M&S) already owned
  • Belt (Amazon trader) £1.50

Total spent so far to outfit myself (if I buy nothing else) is £14.74.

Compared to January I’m not only physically healthier but financially in the pink too – and furthermore many of the clothes that I purchased a few weeks ago as ‘aspirational items’ now fit me!

All of this makes me feel flipping tremendous – and I think that the buzz that this has produced is what’s kept me awake overnight, because rather than worrying about what the scales will have in store for me I’ve been thinking about the future and what I can do now as opposed to what I can’t.  

Anyway I must get back home and get ready to go to group…

(goes home, gets changed and heads out)

Well the scales this week are evil.

Last week I had an epic loss – and after another really really really good week where I’ve been completely on plan (I estimate 1500-2000 calories per day MAX) somehow I’ve managed to put 3.5lbs ON!

I can fit in smaller clothes this week than I could last week and I’ve felt much lighter and trimmer but that’s not all.

On top of that I’ve walked 62 miles!

Truthfully I don’t know what else I could have done to lose weight.

For the last two weeks there have been different consultants and they each bring their own scales – and honestly my first impulse because of this was to blame the weighing in machines because they were different. However – other people lost weight – which immediately undermines any grumbles I might have about technology getting in the way of my progress – and if I did choose to use this as an excuse it would also detract from their hard earned progress, which they deserve.

I’m just going to have to take this one on the chin and be happy for those that did well and know that it will be my turn soon. Something inside me somewhere is holding onto something or some muscles are bigger and stronger so I’ll just have to accept that.

Anyway. I can’t be angry. Not when I have a dog to play with.

Immediately after group I went for the second walk of the day – which seemed appropriate as the image therapy session was all about body magic and counting the steps that you do to make sure that you supercharge weight loss. Despite the fact that it clearly hasn’t worked this week the more that I do the better I feel.


However – the weather wasn’t planning to let me cheer myself up without consequence. It absolutely slashing it down in the park when I met my friend and Boris the frenchie.

Getting outdoors, even if it’s under a large umbrella just makes everything better. You can twalk away about nothing and everything, just watching the world passing by and dogs occasionally sniffing each other’s butts.

You can’t fault an animal whose chief pleasure in life is derived not from wealth, status or power – but from the aroma of another mutt’s behind.

Sigh. If only life were that simple.

Eat, sleep, poop, sniff butt, repeat.


It seems to suit Boris pretty well – and just watching him chill out after our stroll makes me happy. He has the right idea. After all – why should I let anything as trivial as some odd results on the scales bother me when life is otherwise so good? I’ve walked ten miles and 20,000 steps so far today. I could have gone home and stuffed my face but I didn’t.

It’s all a matter of perspective internet.

Plus fragrant butts.

They help too.




9 thoughts on “Fragrant butts

  1. Scales aren’t just evil, they also LIE. Or at least mislead. How great would it be to get such an accurate reading that we could find out each week how much fat we’ve obliterated? I have no doubt that they will be kinder next week though!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. One of the reasons why we retain fat and water is that the body is protecting vital organs from damage. Few people tell us of the the danger of acidity in our bodies. It is the ideal environment for diseases, ageing, and getting cancer. Increasing alkalinity via green, living foods is crucial. This link refers to the experience of the speaker, who at 19 was crucial in helping reverse cancer in a friend’s mother, who was given 9 weeks to live. In around 4 weeks her tumours had shrunk dramatically. Over 20 years later, she is alive and a beloved family friend. Anyone trying to lose weight fast needs this information. Congratulations on proving how your body is guarding you from such damage, by this post. No doubt, you’ll get a big drop later. It is great to know that even with your best efforts, your system outwits you when necessary!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Wow some dashing new clothes (just look at that transformation!), good blood test results and talking with Boris and his owner. Sounds like you had a massively good week. As for the scales: screw them. You have at least lost in inches so that’s a good indication that the fat percentage has gone down.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Pingback: 2017 retrospective (part two) – daveywankenobie

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